Last year in the state of Tennessee, a new law was passed that allows a couple to obtain a “covenant marriage” license, which is different from the usual marriage license.
Knoxville News Sentinel (knoxnews.com) reports that divorce would be more difficult for couples who choose a covenant marriage. According to the bill, “Only when there has been a complete and total breach of the marital covenant commitment may the non-breaching party seek a declaration that the marriage is no longer legally recognized.”[1]
The article goes on to identify the circumstances under which a divorce would be granted in the Volunteer State (Tennessee) under this new law:
- A spouse has committed adultery.
- A spouse has committed a felony and has been sentenced to death or “continuous confinement.”
- A spouse has abandoned the couple’s home for more than one year and refuses to return.
- There has been physical or sexual abuse.
- The spouses have been living separately and apart continuously for more than two years.
- There are “excesses, cruel treatment, or outrageous conduct” that would make living together “insupportable.”[2]
The goal of the bill is to enable people to view marriage as being a lifelong relationship, not something that can be jumped into or out of on a whim or simply because of “irreconcilable differences.”
While I applaud this new legislation, I find the mere idea of it—that such a change in the law is even necessary—to be alarming. Unfortunately, it seems that many people view marriage as more of a contract commitment than a covenant commitment. What do I mean by this? What is the difference between a covenant and a contract?In the Old Testament, God made a covenant with Abraham, promising him that his children would be a great nation. We see that covenant promise fulfilled in the people group of Israel. But what makes it a covenant rather than a contract?
It has been said that a contract exists for the benefit of an individual, and it is broken by even the smallest indiscretion. This can be seen in the many business contracts that are regularly drawn up. Even the smallest breach of contract can void the entire agreement.
A covenant, on the other hand, exists for the benefit of a relationship and is only broken by the largest of indiscretions. Not only does this apply to God’s covenant with Abraham and Israel, but it also speaks loudly to our marriage covenants of today.Marriage is one place in our earthly existence where God gives us a true reflection of who He is within the Holy Trinity. In Genesis 2:24 (NIV), God tell us, “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Within marriage, a male and a female become one—spiritually, emotionally, and physically. This is a reflection of the Holy Trinity, and it is a place where God allows us an intimate glimpse of His very nature.
Many scholars have speculated as to the nature of the Trinity. What could possibly hold three together as one? The answer to this question is love. Love is the bond that holds the Trinity together as one. I have often tried to find words to describe the Trinity, but it is difficult to put words to something so unfathomable. However, I have found one thought particularly helpful.
Have you ever known a married couple who have been together for 50 plus years, and they are still just as in love as the day they met? These relationships are special, encouraging, and interesting. Two people can sit in silence, simply enjoying one another’s presence. Or they can talk and finish one another’s sentences. After years of marriage, you can see how two are becoming one.
In my efforts at theological reflection, limited as they are by my humanity, I like to think about the Trinity in this manner: What if that couple could have more than 50 years together? What if they had 100 years? Or 250? Or 1,000 years together? How much closer would they be? Consider how close a married couple could get over the course of eternity—with no beginning and no end. This is how I envision the Holy Trinity as reflected within the marriage bond.
This is why marriage is so special and spiritual. This is why it SHOULD be viewed as a covenant, and not a contract. If love holds the Trinity together as one, can it not hold you and your spouse together through anything?
This is why marriage is so often under attack. Within a true, devoted, and intimate relationship, we find the ultimate meaning of love. And within that love, we find a small piece of the Trinity here on earth. Do not give up that piece of God within you and your spouse. It is special. It is unique. It is God-given. And it is holy.
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[1] Allison Kiehl, “What Is a Covenant Marriage? Proposed Tennessee Bill Would Create Marriage Distinction. Here’s What to Know,” Knoxville News Sentinel, February 3, 2025, https://www.knoxnews.com/story/news/politics/2025/02/03/covenantmarriage-traditional-marriage-tennessee/78021445007/.
[2] Kiehl, “What Is a Covenant Marriage?”
