“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” – Genesis 2:24 (NKJV)
Marriage means to be joined together and to become one flesh. Other translations of the above verse use phrases such as “be united,” “hold fast,” or “shall cleave unto.” The original Hebrew word used here is dāḇaq ©†.©קַבָּד
The Hebrew word dāḇaq means to cling, cleave, stick, be joined, or even be glued together. It reflects a permanent bond. This word appears more than fifty times in Scripture. One example is found in Deuteronomy 10:20, where God establishes a renewed covenant with Israel after the first tablets [of the Ten Commandments] were broken. God calls His people to cling to Him—to fear Him, to serve Him, and to swear by Hisname—rather than following man-made idols. Similarly, Joshua 23:8 records Joshua reminding the Israelites to cling to the Lord and remain loyal to Him.
This clinging describes an intimate loyalty—a full dependence on God’s power and grace.
Dāḇaq, thus, encompasses all this: to cling, to hold on, to be loyal, to fight for, to put effort into, to love, to care, to prioritize, to build a foundation, to promise, to bond, to offer oneself fully, and to be unashamed.
From the very beginning, God intended man and woman to be together. We read of Adam and Eve enjoying one another’s company, working side by side, and caring for the Garden of Eden— everything God had entrusted to them. Marriage is God’s design; it is a gift that reflects His nature of living in community. It is a unified partnership that holds fast regardless of circumstances or challenges.
My husband and I were married in February 2008. I was 22 years old, and he had just turned 21 a week before our wedding. We were young, inexperienced, full of hope and emotion, and eager to begin life together. The past 18 years have been the most beautiful—and the most challenging—years of our lives.
Through 18 years of clinging to one another, we are now the proud parents of three beautiful children. We serve in our local church in Langen, Germany, where my husband serves as an elder. Together we have served as youth pastors for many years and continue to serve as camp directors. Our hearts are for the nations, and we are honored to serve as youth coordinators for Wider Europe and the Middle East. Every two years, we help lead the European Youth Conference, Get Plugged In, alongside Youth Ministry Director Kirk Rising. My husband works full time as a client service director for a marketing company, and I work part time for an airline.
Together, we have laughed, cried, fought, argued, grieved, celebrated, loved, cared, ignored, aggravated one another, endured, and remained loyal.
The testimony of our marriage is this: We choose to cling.
We married young, found our footing in our careers, and devoted our time, finances, and prayers to ministry. We have always been full-time ministers, even when not labeled as pastors. Our marriage reflects our passion for the Lord and for the lost. That is what I love most—we serve together and allow the Holy Spirit to lead us through different seasons. It is a joy to serve as a married couple.My grandmother once told my mother that she would make two of the most important decisions of her life. The first would be to say yes to Jesus. The second would be deciding to whom she would say yes in marriage. Both decisions shape an entire lifetime.
I said yes to Jesus. And I said yes to my husband. And I will gladly continue to say yes to both until I have finished the race.Like every marriage, we have experienced both highs and lows. In the first months of our marriage, we barely had enough money for groceries. Our parents fed us and allowed us to wash our clothes in their homes because we could not afford a washing machine. We learned together how to steward what little we had and how to find favor in our work. Tithing became a priority—even when we had very little—and we witnessed firsthand how faithful God is. We never lacked.
Our greatest struggle was infertility.The pain of longing for children—crying out to the Lord while continuing to serve faithfully, watching friends and family start their families, and holding babies while wondering if we would ever kiss our own—was heartbreaking. We endured miscarriages, years of waiting, countless doctor visits, medications, and desperate prayers for healing.
Yet God remained faithful, even when we felt weak.
As we clung to one another, we clung to the Lord—and He blessed us with three wonderful children. They are our greatest testimonies, and we thank God for them daily.
Marriage is sharing life—discovering new places together, facing joys and sorrows side by side, falling asleep together, and waking up to face each new day as one. It is having someone who holds you, challenges you, and cares for you.
My husband often jokes that he “saved” me—because I knew I wanted to marry him the moment I realized I needed to be more Spirit-filled to walk alongside him. He encouraged me to draw closer to Jesus. He truly is the best thing that happened to me after saying yes to Christ.
“Two are better than one. . . . A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:9, 12 NIV).
As my husband and I cling to one another, God remains the center of our cord. We are woven together as husband and wife, each of us individually clinging to the Lord. Without the Holy Spirit’s leading, we are not strong enough. To cling to one another, we must first cling to God.
I believe marriages must become a greater priority in our ministries and churches. Healthy, Spirit-filled marriages lead to healthy, Spirit-filled families; and healthy families build healthy, Spirit-filled churches and generations.
Our ministries and jobs cannot consume all our love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. First, we must cling to Jesus personally, then to our marriages and families. From that overflow, we minister.
My marriage is not perfect. I am not a perfect wife or mother. But, because of the Spirit’s conviction, I am determined to do better—to love more deeply, forgive more quickly, cultivate peace, and grow in kindness, gentleness, and self-control.
In my recent studies at Spirit and Life Seminary, I was deeply inspired by Dr. Michael Hernandez’s book, Shalom in the Pentecostal Family, where he writes that the condition of families affects the condition of the church. I would add this: The condition of marriages affects families, and families affect the church.
So I ask,
- What is the condition of your marriage?
- What is the condition of your family?
- What is shaping your church?
- How can the Holy Spirit strengthen your home today?
Joel 2:28–29 promises an outpouring of the Holy Spirit on all people—young and old, male and female. That outpouring is for marriages and for children. The first Assembly in 1906 encouraged families to practice daily worship together—to kneel in prayer as a household. I believe our marriages need more grace and forgiveness, less resentment, and more compassion, love, and Holy Spirit guidance.
Would it not be beautiful if the Church of God of Prophecy were known for healthy, Spirit-filled marriages and families?
As for me and my house, we will cling . . . to the the Holy Spirit and to one another.
